An Ode to Superb Refereeing

Thorsten Kinhöfer: A Job Well Done

Oh, Thorsten Kinhöfer, to your glorious whistle we sing,
From Herne to Kaiserslautern, good judgement did you bring.
Only two yellow cards you produced on this day,
All to let the boys from ‘Lautern and Leverkusen play.

You called no ticky-tack fouls,
Not swayed by appeals,
Nor by dives of which attackers made meals.

Numerous shoulder charges from either side, you saw fit to ignore,
And when stopped for complaint, you showed them the door.
Only two yellow cards you produced on this day,
All to let the boys from ‘Lautern and Leverkusen play.

Dick quite blatantly interfered,
Castro tackled rather too hard,
Oh, these infractions two, each a clear yellow card.

Due to officials in recent weeks, there has been controversy of all kinds,
Many penalties given, and Tore called offside by questionable minds.
But you, Herr Kinhöfer of Herne, oh, did you decide,
In this match, the result would go to the better, not luckier side.

Sidney Sam scored from the edge of the box,
And impressive Ballack did too,
You, wise Kinhöfer, stayed silent, allowing the two.

The game was played wide open, workmanlike and fast,
Physical though it was, you allowed the time between fouls long and vast.
Entertaining, contentious and chances galore,
A quiet whistle gave no opportunity for a snore.

‘Lautern had their shouts,
Few and far between,
Down the Bayer flanks these chances did they glean.

In the end, your excellence saw an exciting 2-0 game,
Forever onward, we will smile seeing “referee,” followed by your name.
The players, you allowed to be the centre of attention,
Even the chatty commentators didn’t think to give you so much as a mention.

Tactics in action, creativity not held back,
The whistle left an unused tool,
We long for a Kinhöfer Refereeing School.

Oh, Thorsten Kinhöfer, to your glorious whistle we sing,
From Herne to Kaiserslautern, good judgement did you bring.
Only two yellow cards you produced on this day,
All to let the boys from ‘Lautern and Leverkusen play.

The Bundesliga Fanatic welcomes new contributor Nik Herrmann.

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